A while back my mom started her post on my Dad and how much she loves him with an apology to me before she quoted a marriage joke.
I’ll admit, my sense of humor isn’t as loose as my mom’s, my brother’s, or my husband’s. It is more loose than my dad’s though, so that’s at least something. Basically I don’t laugh as easily. I usually try to play this off as sophistication, but to be honest, I feel a little boring sometimes because of it.
There’s a lot that I don’t laugh at, but marriage jokes, bathroom humor, prejudice, and degrading sexual remarks are at the top of the list (unless my brother tells it, then anything goes pretty much–we all have a price). I don’t laugh at them and I don’t like them. And I will not lighten up. I don’t need to. I firmly feel that society needs to tighten up a bit.
To clarify, a marriage joke would be something like those t-shirts where it looks like a video game with a bride and groom exclaiming “Game Over.” I hate those shirts. Or–Q: Why is marriage like a violin? A: Because after the beautiful music is over, the strings are still attached.
This is one of those areas where I truly don’t feel that my sense of humor is lacking. If you ask my mom, I never laughed at these jokes before I was married. I certainly don’t now. I usually say these things are “divinely inspired.” These parts of me where I feel so convinced that something is wrong though the rest of the world views it as funny, acceptable, or the norm. Especially since I generally felt these things before I was old enough to understand why I felt they were wrong. I always just did. They always bothered me.
“It’s just a joke!” “Lighten up!” “Poor Zach!” People say.
Not poor Zach. Lucky Zach, I say. Lucky Zach because I now know why I’ve always disapproved of such jokes.
Marriage can and should be an amazing gift. Not “If you’re lucky.” Not if “It’s a miracle.” And most certainly not “Until the honeymoon’s over.” A blessing every single day. Even in disputes and disagreements, essentially you always have someone on your side. Someone to hold you when you cry. Someone who loves you no matter what. It is truly a wonderful thing.
And the world’s view of marriage is become more and more diluted. I believe that behind every joke is a little truth. If you tell those jokes, there’s a reason…somewhere deep down inside. If you laugh at one of those jokes, there’s a reason, too. And I suppose all married folk can probably relate to those feelings/punch lines–some more than others for sure.
But all it does is perpetuate this negative connotation that marriage kills romance, excitement, and sadly love. It doesn’t even make sense. What is it teaching the younger generations about what to expect from marriage?
I know that I personally had way underestimated marriage and I tell Zach on an almost daily basis that it continues to surpass my expectations. Good for me, right?! Yes. But at the same time, do I think that we should all expect less than that. No. But that’s what those jokes tell us.
If you think about it, how often (aside from social media…blogs, Facebook, Twitter) how often do you hear someone just randomly talk about how awesome marriage is? How awesome anything is really?
Why must we always play things small. Why is there this need in society to trample all over the good things? And how detrimental is it really? I think very. I think it has a far-reaching effect that we don’t really comprehend.
I understand that there are some unhappy marriages out there and that some people leave and some people stay and work through really tough things. But those realities shouldn’t be mocked either. I believe that our God put us here with the sole purpose of creating families. Marriage being the starting point of said family. Therefore, it is a Godly institution in my eyes. I wouldn’t be okay with you mocking the temple that I go to to worship and draw closer to my Father in Heaven…so why would it be okay to mock a marriage?
Call me over the top, don’t worry–I get it all the time–but I love being married and with all of my heart feel that I have been given a precious gift. To mock it would just not be right.
I have always felt this way but then felt super validated when I read this article on Fox News..moreso the top half of the article not the bottom half as much. I have an opinion on the bottom half that I might share another time.
What are your thoughts on marriage jokes?